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The Meg Review

As a demon, I am a huge fan of monster movies. Anytime I see a preview for one, I am all in, as long as it is clear I will get to see something awesome. The Meg preview had me in the first few seconds. It looked like an amazingly silly Jawsploitation (yes this is a real term) movie.

The Meg doesn’t let you even get comfortable, as it drops you in the middle of a search-and-rescue mission where Jonas (Jason Statham) and crew are attempting to rescue the crew of a disabled sub. Things start to get hairy and the sub explodes, leaving Jonas believing he saw something more than just an exploding sub. The movie takes off from there, introducing the billionaire businessman paying for a marine research center (Rainn Wilson), the Station manager and his marine biologist/daughter and granddaughter, and a whole slew of other cast members. Suffice it to say that diving as deep as they do disturbs something down below. The Meg allows for the viewer to just go along for a ride where the lines are all delivered very seriously (and hilariously) and the action doesn’t vary from the predictable. Even still, the movie was very much not a waste of time.

Don’t get me wrong, the movie is incredibly cheesy, but the cast carries it well. Some may throw this movie into the same category as Piranha 3D and Sharknado, for obvious reasons, but this movie has so much more heart than the other two. Heart in the characters and the way their stories are told. Heart in the way that they understand what movie they are acting in. One of my favorite scenes, one that gives this movie more heart, that the end is much like the ending of the first Jurassic Park. Remember how the velociraptors help the group escape from the t-rex?...Well that is all I’ll say. Speaking of referencing other movies, there are a lot of well-timed references that had me laughing in the theater. Usually the movies I watch don’t allow for laughs and a huge, red laughing demon in a theater always make people weirded out. But it still had me in stiches (like Sickle’s victims when he stitches them back together).

Most arthouse film viewers will probably hate this movie. It is full of plot holes, unexplained technology and seemingly nonsense science, but I think that is what makes it so great. Let’s say you hear about a movie called The Meg. Without any research, one probably assumed it is a Rom-Com about a girl named Megan and her adventures in love. Then you go check out a preview of The Meg and figure out it is a high budget shark movie. Let’s just say you know what you’re getting yourself into when you buy the ticket. I am of the opinion that this movie was well worth the 6-dollar Alamo matinee movie price.

Unfortunately none of the score I can give of this movie will accommodate my enjoyment of it so I have made up my own!

Jawsplotation Qualifier: 10/10

Fear of Open Water Rating: 10/10

Shark vs Human Death Ratio: 2/20+

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