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Monkeying Around

Zoombies Review

There are many indicators before watching a second of this film that it isn't going to be of the highest quality. The two most obvious indicators are the title (of course) and the fact that the film was brought to us by the same crew that did Sharknado. Now we have watched a lot of questionable films in our time in an attempt to find those special diamonds in the rough and to inform our readers, but never have I conceded in watching Sharknado. Had I done my research beforehand and discovered that Zoombies was done by the same people, I probably wouldn't be writing this review right now.

I have heard that Sharknado was so awful that it was entertaining on the merit of its disgracefulness. If Zoombies is a window into such "entertainment", I'm not connecting with this crowd of movie watchers. Like I said, MST3K wouldn't touch this garbage...Or shouldn't...I am a strong proponent for the philosophy, "if you can't afford decent special effects/CG, don't use them." In other words, use your low budget to work the imagination rather than throw cartoon zombie animals in the audience's face.

The CG, as would be expected, is abysmal. It is so distracting and awful that it makes the entire movie unbearable. The acting, writing, was beyond the point of parody and humor. I feel like just having watched it, I have incidentally contributed to the further production of films like it, and for that I am sorry.

While I can be tough on a film, most people who read my reviews will acknowledge that I try to find the silver lining. Even a blatant effort to achieve something beyond a cheap dollar I can commend. But there is merely nothing redeemable about Zoombies. I have nothing to offer a reader who wants to be talked into it. Look at the title of the film! What good could come from a title like that without Alan Tudyk and Tyler Labine running from rabid lemurs?...Hmm....Zoombies remake!

Horror Qualifier: 7/10

Horror Quality: 3/10 - That koala scene was messed up, even if it was off-camera...I'll give you that...

Film Quality: 1/10

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